I changed my last name twice in my life. When I married my first husband, I happily gave up the last name “Just” for “Kaplan.” While Just may seem a great name for a lawyer, as a kid it lent itself to a lot of teasing. I also liked the name Kaplan as it put forth my Jewish identity more so than Just. When I divorced my first husband I had the option to again use the name Just. I choose to maintain the last name of Kaplan so as retain the same last name as my children. I felt, at that time, it would avoid confusion at their schools and camps.

Eight years after my divorce, when I had chosen to remarry, I was again faced with the quandary of my last name. I had the option to keep any one of three last names, Just, Kaplan, and Gura (my new husband’s name). After much discussion with my husband, children, and step-children I chose to take my new husband’s name. Interestingly, while I thought my children would be upset at the prospect of changing my last name to one that’s different than theirs, both of them voiced the same opinion: it didn’t matter what I called myself, I was still their Mom.

Over the years I have gotten very mixed reactions to my choices concerning my names. While I consider myself a feminist, those who share feminist views have criticized me for my choice to take my husbands’ names. I have always found that sort of criticism incongruous because, to me, feminism has always been about a woman’s right to freelymake these type of choices.

Tell me about your name.