[Fredslist] Learn from my estate planning nightmare

[Langsam, Andrew]

And, my father in law, never took a vacation in over 40 years, worked as a business man for his life, a landlord for the last 20, amassed an estate of about 10 million dollars and now, because he refused to do the right thing, we are likely looking at providing IRS with a check in the amount of about $1.5 million plus  and the NYS Tax Dept. about $600,000 or more.

What a waste where a little bit of planning would have saved his 4 children a lot of money.

Andy
________________________________
From: fredslist-bounces at gothamnetworking.com [fredslist-bounces at gothamnetworking.com] on behalf of Liz Saldana [LSaldana at Halstead.com]
Sent: Friday, September 21, 2012 12:48 PM
To: fredslist at gothamnetworking.com
Cc: Erin Ardleigh; 'Jane Beddall'
Subject: RE: [Fredslist] Learn from my estate planning nightmare

Agreed! However, just in case Erin’s story isn’t enough; I’ll add mine.

My Father-in-Law, who insisted to everyone for years including after finding out he was terminally ill, that “everything was taken care of”.  Well there’s no nice way to say this…he lied.  While in the hospital he ask me (he was too afraid to ask one of his 6 children) to ask his attorney to bring his Will to the hospital so he could sign it.  Guess what?  When I called, the attorney said “What Will?”  The day before he passed away, my father-in-law signed a basic Will.  My husband and I have been cleaning up the mess this left since 2006.

We have wonderful resources in Gotham.  Have your family and friends call them, call them yourselves!  I know times are hard and we are all busy trying to survive; but this is important.

Liz


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A referral is the greatest compliment of all!

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Liz Saldaña
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Halstead Property, LLC
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From: fredslist-bounces at gothamnetworking.com [mailto:fredslist-bounces at gothamnetworking.com] On Behalf Of Jane Beddall
Sent: Friday, September 21, 2012 8:29 AM
To: Erin Ardleigh
Cc: fredslist at gothamnetworking.com
Subject: Re: [Fredslist] Learn from my estate planning nightmare

Brava, Erin!  You do a great service to talk about a "real life" scenario that has touched your family. We will all die someday and it's those we leave behind who can suffer if we do nothing to plan for our own death or don't give careful attention to planning. As you say, it's not necessarily easy, but it's very important. I hope your personal message will motivate some Gothamites to do what needs to be done!


Jane Beddall, M.A., J.D.

Dovetail Resolutions, LLC

203.887.1160

24 Dixwell Ave. #214

New Haven, CT 06511

jb at dovetailresolutions.com<mailto:jb at dovetailresolutions.com>

http://www.dovetailresolutions.com



Mediation and Consulting --

Business Mediation

Family Wealth Mediation

Elder Mediation


On 9/20/2012 5:46 PM, Erin Ardleigh wrote:
Don’t let yourself go through the nightmare that my family is going through due to a lack of estate planning!

This is not a promotional post, it is in fact a very personal story that I hope might motivate a few of you.

My grandmother died in 2007, and 5 years later, her estate still is not settled. She didn’t believe in estate planning, and as a result, gave millions to the government rather than to her family or a charity. She did create a will, but didn’t discuss her wishes with her family and didn’t pick a competent executor. The ensuing mess would make a great reality TV show – warring siblings, IRS penalties, angry lawyers, a dead accountant (really!) mysterious heirs to a fortune, never ending delays, and irreparable damage to a family.

Don’t be season two of this show! Make sure you and your family members all have wills, health care proxies, trusts if appropriate, proper (in force) insurance and that you tell someone about your wishes. There are many wonderful people in Gotham that assist in this process, including mediators that can help initiate what some find to be a very difficult conversation.

(BTW I’m NOT looking for professional advice or representation – unfortunately I did not have a say in who was hired, other than my father’s attorney. I wish I could’ve hired all Gotham members ;) I have had wonderful CPA’s and attorneys give me advice and help along the way.)

Again, I am sharing this so that others can learn from my troubles. The silver lining to my experience is that my family members all see the urgent need to do proper planning. However, too many people say to me, ‘oh I don’t have a will, I’ll get to it sometime’ or ‘I have no idea about my parents’ affairs – it’ll be a mess when they’re gone’. Trust me, when professionals in the estate planning business tell you that you need to act now, it’s not a high pressure sales technique – there is a serious risk to ignoring their advice. Don’t learn that the hard way.

Erin Ardleigh



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