[Fredslist] FW: Your best friend is comfortable with your past; your mentor is comfortable with your future

[Linda Queenie Newman]

Good Morning Along the Network,

Please see below sent to me by Mentor and Gotham Member, Gary Anzalone.
Gary was the first Mentor match I made as Co-Chair of Gotham's Mentoring
Program.  Gary is Alex Klein's Mentor.  Alex Klein is Gotham's Creative
Director.  (A most wonderful combination!)

For those of you interested in having a Mentor or being a Mentor, please
contact me by e-mail.

Best,

Linda, Co-Chair
Gotham Mentoring Program 


Linda R. Newman
 
Third Generation Insurance Broker
 
lindarnewman at verizon.net
 
www.ssfinsurance.com 

-----Original Message-----
From: Gary Anzalone [mailto:gma59 at optonline.net] 
Sent: Tuesday, March 13, 2007 11:58 PM
To: Linda Newman; Fred Klein
Subject: Your best friend is comfortable with your past; your mentor is
comfortable with your future

This is long, but thought you both would find it interesting.  Gary

                    "The Tuesday Tip"
>                        March 13, 2007
>
>                 Publisher:  Dr. Alan Zimmerman
>                 Contact:    Alan at DrZimmerman.com
>                 Telephone:  (800) 621-7881
>                 Web site:   www.DrZimmerman.com

> Pass It On -- Please
>
> To read the Tuesday Tip in HTML format, click here 
> http://www.drzimmerman.com/tuesdaytip.htm
>
> Dr. Alan Zimmerman's Comment:
>
> Life is short.  We simply don't have enough time to learn everything 
> we need to know all by ourselves.
>
> And we don't have enough stamina to learn everything the hard way ... 
> through trial and error.  But that's what ignorant people do.  They 
> give it a try to see if it works.
>
> The really smart, successful people rely on O.P.E. -- Other People's 
> Experience.  They know they don't have to go through colossal failure 
> to learn a lesson.  They can shorten their learning curve by accessing 
> the wisdom, knowledge, and experience of others who have gone before them.
>
> The really smart people have mentors or coaches.  Look around.  The 
> top athletes continue to work with coaches.  And the top business 
> people seek out mentors.  I know I do.  For nine years I have met with 
> eight of the finest speakers and consultants in the world -- a group 
> called Master Speakers International.  And I can trace more personal 
> and professional growth to that experience than anything else I have ever
done.
>
> What about you?  Do you have a coach ... or a mentor ... or a group of 
> such people?  Do you consult with them regularly?  It's one of the 
> secrets of every highly successful individual.
>
> So let's explore the role of a possible mentor in your life.  But 
> first you may wonder,
>
> =>  1.  Why do you need a mentor?
>
> Because ... no matter how well you know yourself, you're always going 
> to have blind spots.  You're going to miss some things that you should 
> know -- whether from oversight, ignorance, or bias.
>
> If you don't believe it, take this test.  Look at a team photo that 
> includes you.  Does your liking of the photo depend on how good you 
> look ... no matter how everyone else looks?  Of course.  Even if the 
> other people had their eyes closed or a piece of spinach in their 
> teeth, if you looked good, you'd probably think it was a pretty good 
> picture.  You're bound to be a bit prejudiced.
>
> A mentor, on the other hand, would help you see the photo more 
> objectively.  He might ask, "Who's the picture for?  How's it going to 
> be used?  And does that particular photo project the image of your 
> team that you want to project?"
>
> A mentor will help you discern the truth.  But you ask,
>
> =>  2.  How is a mentor different than a teacher?
>
> There are several differences.  Teachers love learning.  Mentors love 
> learners.  In other words, when you have a mentor, he or she cares 
> about you ... not just the stuff you're learning.  (And for the sake 
> of clarity, I speak to a lot of classroom teachers, and many of them 
> are both teachers and mentors.  They're professionals in every sense 
> of the word, and they love their students.)
>
> Such was the case years ago in a particular orphanage.  Someone came 
> in and asked, "Is there any orphan here that nobody wants?"  The 
> matron answered, "Indeed there is.  She's ten years old, ugly to look 
> at and has a very horrible hunchback.  In fact, the only decent thing 
> about her is her name -- Mercy Goodfaith."
>
> The inquirer was a mentor at heart and said, "That's exactly the child 
> I want."  And together they left.
>
> Thirty-five years later, the head of the Orphanage Inspection 
> Department in the State of Iowa turned in a report about another 
> orphanage she visited.  Her report said, "This home is outstanding.  
> It is clean; the food is good, and the matron of the place has a soul that
oozes love."
>
> The report went on to say, "All of the children are well-cared for and 
> show the effects of the matron's love.  As they gathered at the piano 
> following dinner, I observed an atmosphere unlike any I have seen in 
> my work.  Never have I seen such love and beauty as I saw in that matron.
> She was so stunning that I almost forgot how homely her face was and 
> how unattractive was the hunchback.  Her name is Mercy Goodfaith."
>
> Because some nameless person chose to love and mentor an ugly orphan, 
> Mercy Goodfaith learned how to love ... and she passed it on to others.
> And that by the way is another factor that distinguishes teachers from 
> mentors.  Teachers hope you get what they are teaching, but mentors 
> want you to absorb it and then share it.
>
> Mentors go beyond education to impartation.  And mentors take you 
> beyond learning to sowing.
>
> Now if that sounds too soft and touchy-feely for you, hang on.  
> Mentors also put correction and challenge into your path.  So,
>
> =>  3.  How does a mentor approach the whole topic of advice?
>
> It's worth looking at.  After all, mentors are more than cheerleaders. 
> They do more than confirm what you are doing correctly.  They CORRECT 
> the mistakes you've made and prevent you from making more mistakes in 
> the future.
>
> You might call such behavior advice giving.  I would call it counsel. 
> Advice giving may be no more than telling a person what to do in a 
> particular situation, whereas counsel gives people some things to 
> think about as they decide the best way to proceed.
>
> It's the difference between giving a person a fish and teaching him 
> how to fish.  The advice or the fish may take care of today's needs, 
> but for an overall, long term, effective approach to life and work, 
> you've got to learn how to catch fish for yourself.  And a good mentor 
> will show you how to do that.
>
> Of course a good mentee will listen to his mentor's counsel.  He'll 
> sift through it to find the pearls of wisdom.  It's the ignorant ones 
> who simply accept or reject everything they hear.  As one person said, 
> "There are two quick ways to disaster -- taking nobody's advice and 
> taking everybody's advice."
>
> One of the quickest ways to achieve excellence, to be effective, and 
> experience success is to spend some regular time with a wise mentor.  
> I know it works for me, and it has worked for millions.  In fact, one 
> of my former professors, indeed one of the best professors I ever had, Dr.
> Sidney Simon, is now my mentor.  We still walk the beaches of Sanibel 
> Island just about every month at 6:30 in the morning as I continue to 
> learn from him.  And I've been meeting with friend and business owner, 
> Jeff Larson, for prayer and counsel every week for 18 years.
>
> If you don't have a mentor, get one.  And don't worry about imposing 
> on him or her.  Just ask if they would serve in that capacity, and 
> they'll give you a straight answer.  In fact, even if they say "no," 
> they'll be honored that you asked.  We all admire the wisdom of those 
> who come to us for advice.
>
> And due to hundreds of requests over the years, I'm going to start 
> serving as a mentor to many of you "Tuesday Tip" subscribers.  I'll be 
> having a special web site just for you, and I'll be available for fax, 
> e-mail, and telephone support.  Look for the details of "Dr. 
> Zimmerman's Peak Performance Inner Circle" in future "Tuesday Tips."
>
> Action:
> Who has been the most helpful mentor in your life so far?  How did 
> he/she help you?  And in what areas of your life would you like some 
> additional mentoring?  Be on the lookout for such a mentor.
>
> Make it a great week!
> Dr. Alan Zimmerman